Small faith, Big God

This is such a good thought that I had to share it with you all. I am struggling a bit as we all will from time to time. But, I have been so blessed by those that the Lord has put into my life. I was talking to a mentor of mine today telling her of my struggles and saying that I am sad that my faith is so small. She reminded me that although my faith is small, my God is big and that is a great comfort. I know that is true but I long to grow in faith. The Lord is doing that for me, let me assure you, but I want the growth and my response to be neck and neck....good and right. Lord, thank you that you are a big God and that you are good even when I might think differently. Thank you that you are faithful and true, and that you do not change. Thank you that even when I can not muster the courage or desire to come before you, like the lover of my soul that you are, you gently whisper to me and call me to your side. Thank you seems so little to say to YOU my father. I love you and I long to worship you in a way that points others to you and takes the focus off of me. Father, please forgive me.

Another Great Book

So many wonderful books to read, I wish I had all the time in the world. I can not complain, I do have a lot more time than some people I know so.....Well, this latest book is one that I have known about for some time, but just recently saw it on a clearance rack at one of my favorite stores....The book " E.M. Bounds on Prayer" Wow, so convicting and eye opening. I am so guilty of anemic prayers...the Lord has been so gentle in bringing these things to my mind as I have read this book. The chapters are short and fairly easy to digest. Do not get me wrong...there is a lot of thought provoking stuff here not to be taken lightly, but a great read. Here is some of what I read today:

A quote by Fenelon- " In God's name, I beseech you, let prayer nourish your soul as your meals nourish your body. Let your fixed seasons of prayer keep you in God's presence through the day, and may His presence frequently remembered through it be an ever fresh spring of prayer. Such a brief, loving recollection of God renews a man's whole being, quiets his passions, supplies light and councel in difficulty, gradually subdues the temper, and causes him to possess his soul in patience, or rather gives it up to the possession of God."

Bounds says: " Thus in every circumstance in life, prayer is the most natural outpouring of the soul, the unhindered turning to God for communion or direction. Whether in sorrow or in joy, in defeat or victory, in weakness or in health, in calamity or in success, the heart leaps to meet with God, just as a child runs to his mother's arms, ever sure that her sympathy will meet every need." He goes on to talk about prayer as a habit and our lack of prayer. He says, " The explanation of our thoughtlessness or forgetfulness lies in the fact that prayer, with so many of us, is a form of selfishness; it means asking for something for ourselves-that and nothing more. And from such an attitude, we need to pray to be delivered."

Father, I confess that I do lack such a prayer life that would bring you ultimate glory. Please forgive me for my selfish attitudes and lazy habits during prayer. I want to grow in that way..to pray without ceasing and to reach your ear at all times praying in your will and standing ready to receive your answer. Lord, you work all things to our good and to your ultimate glory which is and should be our goal and desire in prayer. Lord, thank you for eyes to see these great books, a head and heart that can reason with the words, and an understanding of what must be done to grow more into your likeness. Thank you Father, that prayer is that intimate connection with You and because of what Christ did on the cross Lord, I am able to enter into fellowship with You. Lord may it never be taken for granted.

Amen

WI-FI and Cheese Dip

This is a strange thing to me but who I am to complain? AS I have posted before, I do not have high speed internet, just dial up but at a small country store down the road from where I live, they do have free wi-fi and they also serve food...so with gas prices the way they are, I am able to drive a very short distance to come and upload pictures to my snapfish account, or send a few emails or just do whatever I need/want to do with my computer and on top of all that, for just $2 I can get a genuine order of chips and cheese dip to boot. Only in Arkansas!!! It is a new experience for me but one that I could get used to! Don't knock it till you try it!!!

What is meekness?

Well, I can for sure tell you what it is NOT! It is not me! And, I am ashamed to say so. But, here is what Matthew Henry says that it is....."Meekness is a victory over ourselves and the rebellious lusts in our own bosoms; it is the quieting of intestine broils, the stilling of an insurrection at home, which is often times more hard to do than to resit a foreign invasion. It is an effectual victory over those that injure us, and make themselves enemies to us, and is often a means of winning their hearts.

He goes on to say..." The law of meekness is if your enemy is hungry, feed him , if he is thirsty, not only give him a drink which is an act of charity, drink with him in a token of friendship and true love and reconciliation and in so doing, heap coals of fire upon his head"....here to me is the interesting part, the coals of fire are not to consume him, but to melt and soften him that he may be cast into a new mold...."

Meekness again is a victory over Satan, the greatest enemy of all. Now, what is meekness but the soul's agreement with itself? It is the joint concurrence of all the affections to the universal peace and quiet of the soul, every one regularly acting in its own place and order and so contributing to the common good. Next to the beauty of holiness, which is the souls agreement with God, is the beauty of meekness which is the soul's agreement with itself."

So, needless to say, I have a long long way to go in the area of meekness. If you are wondering, the name of the book is THE QUEST FOR MEEKNESS AND QUIETNESS OF SPIRIT......Matthew Henry

Learning is so fun!

I am having such a great time as I sit in the Word and meditate on what God has for me there. I celebrated a birthday last month and one of my gifts was a cookbook similar to one that I already had, so my sweet friend gave me the receipt to take it back. (FYI-a true friend does not get her feelings hurt if you already have one of what she got you or you just plain do not like it, she also does not mind if you sell what she has given you in a garage sale at some point!! ) Thanks for being that kind of friend to me!!!! Anyway, I digress....with the money I got from the cookbook, I was able to put it toward a WONDERFUL resource that I have just been learning about. Matthew Henry's Commentary! It is so huge and so wonderful! I have loved it and been looking at it often. I have MILES to grow in my christian walk and this is helping me in the journey. Today, I read Psalm 121...as I was looking at vs5-6...The LORD is your keeper; The LORD is your shade at your right hand. The sun shall not strike you by day, nor the moon by night.

Here are a few of the things that I learned, The word Shade used here is used as Refreshment ......M.H. " He not only protects those whom he is the keeper of, he refreshes them, He is their shade. Also, I learned in that same verse, "he promises to be our umbra-our shadow, to keep as close to us as the shadow does to the body..." "Under this shadow, we may sit with delight and assurance; He is always near to his people for their protection and refreshment..."Is that a great God or what?

Father, thank you for being my umbra! Thank you for being refreshment to my soul and for being a shadow of protection and my keeper. Lord, thank you for answered prayer and for meeting with me. I am so unworthy but because of your great love for me, you do meet with me and I am ever grateful.

Sweet Laughter

With all that I "seem" to have going on right now, I had the wonderful blessing of spending some time with my sister, her family, my brother and 2 of his kids and my mom. My brother who I do not get to see often due to the fact that he is in the military, was in town to visit his two daughters this week and we decided to have a family cook out with my sister tonight. My brother manned the grill while we all played ball or threw a Frisbee in the back yard. It was a sweet time. I sooo love seeing my nieces and nephews anytime that I can. They grow up so fast and it makes me long for the day when they were babies!!! :( We played American Idol on the play station and it was so much fun. My nephew is AWESOME at all that electronic stuff so he got to be in charge.....my nieces just jumped right in and sang their little hearts out. There has been so much that has gone on in our family, that this was a nice time to see everyone let their hair down and just be together. I love being an Aunt. I loved kissing and hugging the kids tonite. My younger niece is still at the age where she will love and hug and just let you comfort her. I took advantage of that tonite because it is what I needed and I think it helped her out too. I am so blessed to have nieces and nephews that want to spend time with me. They think that I am weird but that is okay... Lord, thank you for my great family, help me not to waste time, help me to speak of You and to show your love as I am around them. Lord, thank you for a sister who believes in You and who longs to live her life in a manner that brings you glory. Lord, would you capture the hearts of my nieces, and nephews and draw them close to you. Use me in whatever way that you see fit. I thank you for the awesome privilege that you have given me to be part of this family. Protect my brother as he goes back home and Lord if you are willing, please grant us the opportunity to see his wife and other 2 kids soon. Thank you again Lord! Amen

Learning something new!!

Well,
Today I had a wonderful day at the Farm. I got the opportunity to spend the day with a friend, her kids and her mom. I learned how to crochet. Well, sort of. I have a long way to go but my teacher was patient and very very kind. So, I look forward to seeing all that I will be able to accomplish!!! Thanks Ms. Ruth for giving me a great lesson and the fellowship was great too!!!